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Mayhew Shambles

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[21 Sep 2006|09:45am]
I stayed home from school today because I am SICK.
:(
I say it's karma for ditching on monday and saying I was sick...

But anyways.
I rolled out of bed at 9 this morning only to have my all-important morning pee disrupted by the cover of my sister's issue Disney Channel Magazine or whatever...

This show Hannah Montana stars this girl (12?) and it is so sad that they make her look like an adult.
She doesn't even have boobs yet!!!!!
She wears more makeup than myself and my mom combined. Seriously! Just look at her head (with her overdone and pound of lipstick) How old would you think she is? 22? Nope. She's like TWELVE!!! ICKY
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It really makes me sad. PLUS the poor girl's real dad is Billy Ray mofuggin Cyrus (singer of ACHEY BRAKEY HEART)
So. She is going to be MASSIVELY fucked up.
On a final note: every picture I find of her in Sammi's magazine has her mouth open all child pornography like..icky...
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It's been a while. [27 Jun 2006|09:47am]
This is important. Yes?
I need information.Collapse )
1 comment|post comment

wow. [26 May 2006|11:35pm]
OLD
2 comments|post comment

Yo [30 Jan 2006|06:20pm]
Yeah. People basically suck.

I hate 99% of people.

Hmm...anyone like a heaping helping of untrustworthiness?
2 comments|post comment

Your face made my soul cry [24 Sep 2005|07:08pm]
[ mood | confused ]

Im pretty dumb
Schoolsprettydumb
my spacebar is pretty dumb
no mirrors is pretty dumb
the pretzels are pretty dumb

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CAUSE IT'S SWEET SWEET VICTORY..yeeeeeah [23 Aug 2005|11:41pm]
Tonight
Chandler spendin de nygt at my housh
We died my hairs
And she drownded me in de tob
She eatsh shpagettiosh cold
Phreak
Ve vill vatch rocky horror peekchur show toonygt
Goohd By
-Das Foreigner
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Sour Skittles = lunch [21 Aug 2005|06:42pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Real food is for SQUARES!
so is breathing
pssh breathing HA I bet you still breath
friggin square
so pathetic you are
Breathing and eating and such
I pity you

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AH MUDERLAND [21 Aug 2005|06:39pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo by the bloodhound gang is an obscene song....wow...
I brazilian wax poetic so pathetically-_-_-I dont wanna beat around the bush Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo
Put the you know what in the you know where pronto
------
Surprising they play the whole song on TV..seeing as they can't censor innuendos I guess I understand why but the WHOLE song is just....yeah...haha...weird

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I loooooooooove livin in the city [20 Aug 2005|06:10pm]
[ mood | confused ]

HAHAHAHAHAHA The movie four brothers or whateva is good
Im knitting a bear finger puppet
I gots me a printer. YAY
Big women spare meat
God...
I'm bored..
I cut my hair cause I was bored
boredom is dangerous for me
Get yer adverbs here

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Prostietuet I hayt choo..... [20 Aug 2005|12:05am]
FUNNNNNNNNNNNNYCollapse )
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slutslutsluttetyslut sluttety slutterslutdow [19 Aug 2005|11:38pm]
dumbwhore
2 comments|post comment

dddd [18 Aug 2005|03:38am]
[ mood | blah ]

One more for good measure....DOODLEEDOODLEEDOODLEE friends post page ruiner time..sorry people im making up for lost time here at 330 am...GIMME A BREAK....pssssssssssssssssssssssssh

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HAHAHA [18 Aug 2005|03:36am]
[ mood | content ]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAI LOVE THISHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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See? [18 Aug 2005|03:35am]
[ mood | chipper ]

So many! THIS IS EASY and fun anf funny and llama and cheese whiz and MEOW MIX

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Posting is [18 Aug 2005|03:35am]
[ mood | content ]

Fun with semagic...I could do this FO EVA

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HAHAHAHA [18 Aug 2005|03:33am]
[ mood | tired ]

IM BACK BAISH! livejournal sucks but OOOOOOk then so does boredom

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hmmm..... [22 Feb 2005|11:38am]
[ mood | PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ]

Well well well, looky here.... stuff
Yeah, yesterday (I think it was yesterday) the weather was CRAZY! Sunny and nice in the beginning then it rained, then it rained HARD, then it hailed like friggin snow bullets. I was outside for whole entire latter half of the crazy weather due to my own curiosity and the fact that I was almost locked out of my own house by the wind... Let me explain:
I was home by myself and it started to rain heavily. So I thought it was time to bring Nikki in the garage. So, I head out to the garage, well first the garage light isn't working and the attic entrance creeps me out so I had to open the garage door a little less than a foot for light. Ok, I was fine. Well I opened the side garage door and hollered for Nikki while the rain blew right at me for about five minutes until I realized the side yard gate was closed and had been for days. So I, in a tank top, pajama shorts, and barefoot, go out into the rain. I'm forced to kick over a cinderblock and yank open the fence and stand there for ANOTHER five minutes while Nikki takes her sweet time meandering over to me. As she finally heads over and we're about two inches from the side garage door the elements turn on me and a sudden gust of wind blows the door shut and it automatically locks!!! All the doors are locked, I'm home alone, Mom is in SF and I don't know when she's gonna be back, and I'm in the OPPOSITE of what I should be wearing in such weather. What am I forced to do? Go out front and crawl underneath the garage door. Less than a foot open. I kept having images pop up in my head of it just letting loose and smashing me but I thought it would be better to risk that than to wait outside for up to an hour for mom to get home...After I dragged myself across the garage floor I could finally reopen the side door and let Nikki in. Ordeal over. AAAAAAAH!
Anyways...tomorrow I might get my hair cut. I don't know how but I'm getting bored with my boring boring head. My friends are NOT very supportive *coRACHELugh* but I HAVE TO DO sooooooomething. I need new clothes. I've realized in the past couple days that I only have two outfits, well three if I combine the two...That's sad. I'm not THAT poor.
I'm going to church tomorrow. HEEHEE. Aren't I special? Is it wrong that I use a place of worship for my own social needs? Not the needs of befriending them but the need to watch them as if they're zoo animals and laugh as I taunt them with peanuts. That's sick in itself, haha. BUT if I pee in the holy water will it still be holy? But if the church isn't catholic and I really need to pee where do I go then?!?!
I'm tired..........and now I do need to pee
Oh and Jessica, Rancid isn't gonna be at this year's warped tour I think...
I AIN'T GIVIN YOU MY TREE FITTY YOU LOCHNESS MONSTA!!!
-Evil Emily
P.S. There was an asassination(sp?) attempt on Bush...need I say more?

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WHAT THE CRAP?!?!?!? [06 Feb 2005|03:41am]
[ mood | Annoyed and angry ]

Oh my....I was highly disappointed by my generation last night. HIGHLY! I knew it was bad...but this is REALLY bad. I honestly don't think I could or would go back to public school if this is how everyone there is. AAAAAAAAAAH, LOSERS!!#!$#%^r*&(
Let me elaborate...
My ongoing nemesis Gianna AKA Hoseph McProstyPants who was known for wearing simpy miniskirts, halter tops, and thongs since the age of ELEVEN. The one who cornered me and attempted to molest me SEVERAL times as she flashed cars in the wee hours of the night. Yes, THAT one...well, she's turned wannabe. Now kids, the word "poser" isn't in my vocabulary because it's a dumb word and I don't like words that start with "P" in general aside from Pepsi, so Wannabe should fit the description. After 12 and a half preppy years full of "ohmigod"s and "like totally"s, she has turned into a Hot Topic fueled wannabe-machine. She is the reason I only shop there in the clearance section and only on very rare occasions. I was dressed like myself and she was dressed like an exact copy straight outta the anti-conforming but already conformed mold. IDIOT! As she sported her Emily Strange shirts (who started this? ME! That's right! Who thankfully grew out of them as soon as the monster named Gianna put one on? ME, THANK GOD!!!!!!!!!!!) paired with her dangly, and bejeweled, skull earrings she complemented the clothes I've worn for a quite a while. The clothes I wore way back when she called me a POSSESSED FREAK just last HALLOWEEN. Now, what was that, 3 maybe 4 months ago? Yeeeeeeeah. Her words, along these lines, made me cringe "Ohmigod, you're pants are AWESOME!" Me-"Uhh..thanks, I made them myself......" Gianna"Wow! I totally wish I was that creative!" Me- "It's not that hard........" She continued to say "totally awesome" and "sooooooooo cool" as I was tempted to take off my pants on the spot because I felt so disgusted that she liked them to the point of her wanting to wear them. I was wearing my Sex Pistols shirt and she gasped and squealed "OOOOOOOOOH! The Sex Pistols! Wow, Awesome, sooo Coool!". Later into the forced conversation she asked, now I don't remember exactly which one it was but it was definately one of these two. She either said "Ever heard of the Ramones?" Or "Ever heard the Ramones" Both of which are VERY dumb questions. Who HASN'T heard OF the Ramones or heard a Ramones song at least once? MORON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was tempted to ask her what her favorite song was by the Ramones just to prove the fact thatshe only brought it up in the conversation to look cool and that she had never actually listened to the Ramones....I guess I'm mean like that. Later as I stood in the hallway of Rachel's house Gianna kept talking and talking and talking, it seemed like it would never end. Rachel and I cornered her in the bathroom and forced her to explain, in POLITE conversation, why she made such a quick and hard to believe style change. She explained how she hates "preppies" (what?) and wanted to kill all the "preppies". Rachel added that if that was the case she should've killed herself a couple months ago. She got mad....As Casey and I started beating eachother up for fun Gianna started talking a little louder and tried to get my attention about how she always playsher music loud in her headphones in class "LyKe PiNk FlOyD aNd StUff" eejjjjit! I don't know about other people, but I think this new surge of kids my age liking Pink Floyd and GNR is just evidence of them trying to hard to be "classic-rock-cool". It is getting annoying! And my OTHER nemesis, the super white girl Rapper with a man face named Laney who had a hatred for rock music just a few months prior has supposedly attempted to turn around to. She brags about her "super cool" black nail polish. BIG DEAL YOU IDIOT. She made fun of my music this summer and told me how it all sucked as she attempted to shake her sad little 12 year old white girl booty to Justin Timberlake and Beyonce. Sad or what?
Maybe I'm just overanalyzing. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood. I don't care what it is, these girls annoy the crap outta me and I hope they go back to their old ways. I never thought I would BEG someone to be a prep. But Gianna JUST GO BACK! NOBODY BELIEVES YOU!! You don't even believe you!!! Am I this bad? Do I look like this to other people? I don't think I look this dumb!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
IDIOTIC FOOLS

3 comments|post comment

testingtesting [02 Jan 2005|11:43am]
comm</a>
2 comments|post comment

Ho-ly-crap [28 Dec 2004|11:31am]
[ mood | not able to go to sleep ]

Someone from the prison escaped
I'm scared
If you're in Vacaville please lock your doors and don't go outside alone....
This is serious......

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